Reboot and Raw

Everglades take me away...

A few days roaming around and feeling free. Back to reality and the drunks of Fantasy Fest wiped it all away.

Feeling extremely raw and exposed right now. 

I was told October would be a difficult month. Like crawling out of a hole and being re-birthed. Well...here we are.

One thing is for sure. I don't like drunks.

Two encounters at work on Friday night were enough for me. It normally doesn't bug me so much but I'm wondering if something big, rooted from a long time ago is being released. If so, may it happen soon.

Tears. 

Hugs from my male co-workers telling me its going to be ok. And those people can go fuck themselves. I apologize to one guy for the tears cause as I explain, once they start I can't stop them. 

Don't apologize for feeling he tells me. You feel things. That's good.

I'm in shock that someone can explain what those tears are. A bubbling up of feeling from the last pressure cooker months finally being released in a very public way.

I also discover that men can't handle tears and will do anything to stop them. In between the hugs, we open a bottle of good wine and I get an offer to go make out with a playful tap on the ass that makes me laugh and hug harder. You gotta love working with a bunch of dudes.

So maybe we should put a crying woman in front of people waging wars. Or male politicians. Things might get done.

Why do people think drinking is the only way to let go? And why are they so awful to everyone around them when they do it?

All I see are shells of people when they are like this. Hungry ghosts. Trying to devour anything to make them whole again. Destroying everything in their path and feeling good about it.

I'm sick of Key West being a dumping ground for the emotionally retarded. All the beauty that is Key West is marred by this kind of tourism.

I hate fantasy fest. Next year I will not be here for it. Maybe not at all...