The Nature of Nurture

As a part of the service industry down here, you are constantly taking care of people. Some days, its pretty damn easy and others not so much. 

After a full week of work, I tend to get sick of hearing my own voice asking people what they need or how I can help them cause lately it never seems to be enough. It can be exhausting at times to think of everyone except yourself.

On my days off I treasure the time I get to take care of me. If I start to get cranky or snarky I have to look at what I'm not giving myself and resolve it quickly. 

I guess that's the perk of dealing with toxic tourists who are perpetually unhappy with themselves and blame everything around them for it. 

If I ever start to become that, someone please shoot me.

On my days off, I can go a whole 24 hours not talking to a soul and be totally content. I make sure to spend those off days doing whatever it is that is going to make myself happy be it painting; riding my bike to glimpse the light at different times of the day or just eating a friggin' doughnut. 

It doesn't have to be monumental.

Bottom line is if we can't make ourselves happy, no one else is going to do it for us. People come down here and spend their one week off trying to get happy. It still surprises me that for a select few, they absolutely cannot do it. No matter how much help they get from others. 

These toxic tourists are land mines and its sometimes hard not to let them get to you. I'm sure you have people in your life like this as well. Its like a hole that keeps getting deeper no matter how quickly you try to fill it.

Last night I had two people that I had the good fortune of getting released from after I couldn't give them what they wanted. At first it annoyed me for a minute but then I was happy about it. 


Funny how they gave me exactly what I wanted most, which was to get rid of them and their ridiculous behavior. 

My other customers nearby were extra kind and complimentary especially after seeing the toddler tantrum my twosome were throwing, which I greatly appreciated. 

It's like murphy's law for these particular toxic tourists, whatever they need they can never ever get. Which mostly is to solve the unhappiness with themselves whatever that may be at the moment.


You can feel the trainwreck about to happen from a mile away and the best thing is to try to disengage knowing that they are getting it. It being the lesson they have not learnt yet and believe me it's a painful lesson for ALL of us.

Most visitors always ask how we locals ended up here, chucking "normal life" in order to have what looks like a non-stop vacation.

My answer to that is this:

A) Reality is how you perceive it. If you are in a hell of your own making, not even living in a tropical paradise will make you happy. You may even begin to see palm trees as pitchforks from Satan.

and 

B) If you just clarify what you need and take care of it yourself, you could be happy anywhere.

Now, time to go eat a doughnut.

STL

The start - in good ole STL.

The last few days have been a "When in Rome..." approach to re-entry in the Midwest. It's been a while but safe to say, I've consumed more meat, doughnuts and beer than I care to admit. Top that off with an extremely shocking racist comedy show at the Pagent and it's "Helloooooo St. Louis!".

Just getting off the plane, I immediately smelled barbecue sauce and the comedian was shocked how no one got too offended at her jokes.

Lots of good things here since the last time I came home. Tons of microbreweries, art festivals, and music. It's Indian summer which is the best time to visit in my opinion. My friend Martha who I've known since I was 5 hosted the best Columbian party ever. Her fiance Basillio is from Columbia so it was a mix of Midwesterners and South Americans which blended very nicely.

Martha is an amazing cook. She made Arepas, a traditional dish that consists of a corn bread type bottom topped off with what else... meat. Oh my God, delicious. And a bar food specialty of unripened mango with salt - probably the best thing I've eaten and so damn simple.

Add a Winking Owl wine from Aldi's the St. Louis ghetto grocery store at $2.50 a bottle. Really good, who knew?! After this fiesta, Martha suggested we go take a trip to Columbia. I'm in.

Got to also catch up with my friend and second mom Jan. Swapped some good ghost stories over martinis and Mich ultra.